yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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