Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize