so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
