bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
