Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
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