I just pynch a tree in the face
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize