do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
