I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
