So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize