I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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