did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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