If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
