guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I just gargled with NyQuil
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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