How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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