i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
