What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize