I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We don't watch enough power rangers
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
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