i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
Randomize