So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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