3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
