do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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