carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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