omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
