I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
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I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
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You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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