I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Another day, another engagement, another cat
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
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