STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
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