i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
