she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
