My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
this must be what syphilis tastes like
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize