i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
