i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
