Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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