Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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