its not stalking. its research.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
