Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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