Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
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