these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
