god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
