were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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