she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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