Don't you send me to vm
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
