Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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