Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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