He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
