only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
