Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
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