Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize