My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
