I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
this will be a night to untag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Randomize