Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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