Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
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Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
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Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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